Take a break—

This past Monday morning, while hanging out the wash (and waiting for the dryer repair-man), I had an epiphany. It’s time I took a vacation. 

We’ve just dropped into the 90s after many days of 100 degree heat. June always used to be the month when we hit 100. July was cooler but more humid. Not this year.

We have no plans to travel this summer, but many appointments—doctors, tree trimmers, dentists, meetings, and other commitments. 

For a vacation, why don’t I take a break at home?

With all that, a break from what?

Writing gives meaning to my life, but lately I’ve been placing—without recognizing it—too much emphasis on that meaning. When writing looms as a burden, it’s a sign my ego has entangled itself in the process.

I am not giving up on my goal to have a completed draft of Quantum Quest by year’s end. But it won’t happen unless I can return to the pleasures and thrills of discovery in my writing. 

For too long, my ego has been acting as  the boss of me, wanting to know why it’s not finished already? An ego is absolutely the last part of anyone to be in charge of writing. 

So it makes perfect sense to take a break. This gives me time to clean house—literally, mentally, and emotionally.

Making this decision, I felt such a lightness! Freed from being the center of a battleground between the boss-ego telling me to do some work, and my creative side obstinately refusing to be bossed around.

First?

Monday, after the dryer was finally, finally (since March!) working again, I embarked on an adventure. One room has been bugging me for months to be rearranged. I got out some graph paper, measured the space and the furniture, and figured out an improved configuration. 

On Tuesday, I unloaded shelves and began shifting furniture. What fun. What freedom. What a pleasure to cut off that boss-ego voice. 

I confess, I have ignored that voice over and over, by escaping into DVDs and reading fiction old and new—consequently failing to write, but not making it okay to not write. Never once did I actually say NO, be quiet, leave me alone. 

This is going to be a staycation adventure.